But I’m actively pursuing my art degree and will have no time to post for, oh, the next three years or so. Sorry! Feel free to browse around my old posts though.
This should be required reading for every woman. I will note that I DO say don’t show skin, because all that does is gratify the male sense of entitlement to unfettered visual access to women’s bodies.
I’ve been watching the promotion of ‘choice feminism’ and reading all the women who talk about how much they love sex and love sucking dick and swallowing cum and how liberating and empowering that is for them. I read comments from women who are all ‘yeah, I love sex, why shouldn’t a woman be allowed to fuck whoever she wants, whenever she wants and not get shamed for it?’ One even said ‘I love being eye candy for men to masturbate to’. And they claim to do all this sexual servicing of men ‘for themselves’ and ‘because I love it’ and they even believe that what they are doing is actually feminist.
The thing with ‘choice feminism’ and sex-positivity, is that they are all about choosing to be sexually available and choosing to present yourself and circulate your image for the facilitation of male sexual gratification. But when it comes…
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If you’re looking for books about how to write memoir on a site like Amazon, there are so many titles and so many of them have five stars. Which of them do you choose?
I googled “What it’s like to be an unattractive woman” in the hope of finding other women like myself to befriend, and among the results was this article by Tracy Moore called “Will Women Ever Have the Freedom to be Ugly?”
It begins on a promising note, as Moore describes her personal experiences of being called ugly and pointing out that if beauty were not expected of women, it would free up a lot of our time, resources and energy.
But then Moore goes on to say:
Second, what do I mean by ugly? Like all things subjective, it’s arguable to infinity. I think when women are called ugly, they are not actually ugly — they are simply noncompliant. They are not willing to spend the time, money and energy it takes to live up to a cultural beauty standard that says skin tones must be evened out, eyes must be enhanced, cheek bones accented, weight managed, desirability advertised, and so on. (Remember, pretty is a skill set.)
Some of us cannot be pretty no matter how compliant we try to be. Spackling makeup on an ugly face will not turn it into a pretty one. Moore seems to be one of those idealists who think there is no such thing as an ugly woman, but the real world tells us otherwise.
Sometimes I really think one of the most radical things a woman can do is simply not brush her fucking hair.
There are many more radical things a woman can do than not brush her hair. For example, she could recognize that she is a member of an oppressed class, and work together with other members of the same oppressed class to dismantle the system that oppresses her.
Reddit is a cesspool of misogyny, but this thread is worth reading: Do Unattractive Women Really Feel Completely Ignored/Invisible?.
“You’re not unattractive!” “You’re not even that fat!” “Someone finds you beautiful!” “Beauty is subjective” OH MY GOD FUCK RIGHT OFF.
Just accept that the world is a mean place sometimes. You telling me my struggles don’t exist makes me feel more invisible. Like you can’t even comprehend the life unattractive people lead so you have to blow smoke up my arse to make yourself feel better? It’s not like people are flinging shit in my face but can we please accept the fact that not being attractive impacts my actions and the actions of others? — commenter sehrah
OMG, THIS THIS THIS.
And my own related piece, Feminists Are Ugly.
So readers, if any of you are conventionally unattractive, I want to be your friend.
Both of these paintings are currently for sale at Artfinder.
Brilliant commentary, a must read.
“No one is born a bigot. Hate is learned.”
This is a old childhood picture of someone who used to be my friend. This cute little boy, smiling so brightly, surely deserved to be happy and loved.
But W. was viciously bullied. He wasn’t athletic and the other kids constantly made fun of him. Home wasn’t much of a comfort either, because his mother would punish him for trivial things by sending him to his room. He spent much of his childhood immersed in comic books.
He grew up believing that people in general were just cruel to one another. This cruelty affected him to his core: inwardly he aligned himself with the bullies and learned to take pleasure in other people’s suffering, and call it humor. But you wouldn’t see it if you know him only casually, because on the surface he can be very kind, generous with gifts and time. You might think he has a dark, twisted sense of humor, but you’d probably overlook it because he seems so good in other ways and is devoted to his friends.
He seems like a nice guy – as long as you don’t get too close.